The slow fade?

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Originally Posted by merince

I am glad to read the above, UL. Spite and vindictiveness are not a way to live a life, even though they feel mighty good in the heat of the moment :D

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Yeah, I know. A lifetime of watching my parents be spiteful and vindictive and then being that way myself in response to it has made it a deeply rooted "go-to" tactic.
Really, it just comes very naturally.

But it makes me a toxic person -- which is not ideal! haha

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Originally Posted by UltraliteAngler

Yeah, I know. A lifetime of watching my parents be spiteful and vindictive and then being that way myself in response to it has made it a deeply rooted "go-to" tactic.
Really, it just comes very naturally.

But it makes me a toxic person -- which is not ideal! haha

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Your situation puts me in mind of a poem by Philip Larkin:

https://web.cs.dal.ca/~johnston/poetry/theverse.html

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Originally Posted by LDAHL

Your situation puts me in mind of a poem by Philip Larkin:

https://web.cs.dal.ca/~johnston/poetry/theverse.html

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That link safe for work?

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Originally Posted by UltraliteAngler

That link safe for work?

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Depends where you work. It does include one four-letter word. Larkin does not shy from that sort of thing.

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Originally Posted by LDAHL

Depends where you work. It does include one four-letter word. Larkin does not shy from that sort of thing.

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I will real it after work. Thanks!

I've always liked that poem, and followed its advice.

my bf sent me that poem.

I spend a lot of time on another board at www.etiquettehell.com (in fact, I believe someone here mentioned it several years ago, which is how I found it). At any rate, there is a lot of information there on how, when and why to employ the Cut Direct. When a relationship has become so toxic that you no longer want anything to do with that other person for your own health and perhaps safety, it's time to put the CD into place. It's not the Slow Fade, but an immediate break. As a prior poster above said, you become a black hole. All contact is cut off - no answered phone calls, emails, social media, etc. If someone sends you a letter or gift, it immediately goes into the trash with no response. Emails are automatically routed to a folder you don't use. If you do happen to be at the same place, you look right through them as if they don't exist. It's pretty hardcore, but some situations call for it. Just some food for thought.

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Originally Posted by beckyliz

I spend a lot of time on another board at www.etiquettehell.com (in fact, I believe someone here mentioned it several years ago, which is how I found it). At any rate, there is a lot of information there on how, when and why to employ the Cut Direct. When a relationship has become so toxic that you no longer want anything to do with that other person for your own health and perhaps safety, it's time to put the CD into place. It's not the Slow Fade, but an immediate break. As a prior poster above said, you become a black hole. All contact is cut off - no answered phone calls, emails, social media, etc. If someone sends you a letter or gift, it immediately goes into the trash with no response. Emails are automatically routed to a folder you don't use. If you do happen to be at the same place, you look right through them as if they don't exist. It's pretty hardcore, but some situations call for it. Just some food for thought.

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Yowzah! You ever done this?

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Originally Posted by UltraliteAngler

Yowzah! You ever done this?

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Did it to my sister for well over a decade.