Trumps: White Angry Middleclass

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3-2-16, 12:40pm
Ultralight

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teacher Terry

Besides Anne Frank and Victor Frankl I also enjoyed reading "Night" and "All but my Life." All are about the Holocaust and most people lost everything & everyone. MY BF lost her wonderful 19yo daughter and yet she goes on and finds joy in life. Yes there is much sadness too. I choose to be happy and enjoy life. It is really just a choice. We can't control what happens to us but we certainly control our reactions and feelings. If you have never looked at Cognitive Behavioral Therapy you might want to explore this. WE have but one life and I for one intend to enjoy it and not waste it.

CBT therapy is like so many things. It takes time and effort -- both in short supply when you work for a living. And if you work, have kids, and perhaps other obligations -- forget it. You might as well drink more wine at night and watch more TV.

I have been seeing a CBT therapist for like 3 years now. She gives me all these assignments but I either don't do them at all or I barely scratch the surface. Why? Because if I did the CBT stuff I would not have time to do much else. No grit to do it left at the end of the day.

I read Kurt Vonnegut. It helps to feel less alone.
3-2-16, 12:42pm
Ultralight

Quote:

Originally Posted by jp1

I can't speak for UA but my high school had an open campus. We just left the building, got in my car, and went to McDonalds, just like we did for every class we skipped. There were days when I was at McDonalds two or three times.

Wow. At my school you'd get punished for that. They'd send you to Room 101. haha

For detention or Saturday school. :(
3-2-16, 12:48pm
bae

Quote:

Originally Posted by jp1

I can't speak for UA but my high school had an open campus.

My high school had a closed campus, you couldn't leave, ever, without an adult signing you in or out.

On the other hand, the school owned all the land to the horizon in all directions, and then some, and you were always welcome to saddle up a horse and work the range. You could even sign out a rifle. As the scholarship kid from California who was a longboard surfer and got around the civilized part of the campus on a skateboard, I was initially a bit out of my element.
3-2-16, 1:03pm
Teacher Terry

UL: those are all excuses for doing nothing to help yourself. I had 3 boys, went to college more then f.t. (got a BA in 3 years), and yes did therapy instead of drinking wine, in addition to driving the kids to all their activities, keeping the house clean, etc. My hubby was working 7 days a week to pay cash for my college so everything on the home front fell to me. They were busy years-I didn't watch TV. Then I got a master's and worked p.t. Then I went on to get 2 more grad degrees. YOu are single with no kids so have plenty of time. If it was important to you to change you would. WE only change when the pain of changing is less then the pain of staying the same.
3-2-16, 1:07pm
Ultralight

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teacher Terry

UL: those are all excuses for doing nothing to help yourself. I had 3 boys, went to college more then f.t. (got a BA in 3 years), and yes did therapy instead of drinking wine, in addition to driving the kids to all their activities, keeping the house clean, etc. My hubby was working 7 days a week to pay cash for my college so everything on the home front fell to me. They were busy years-I didn't watch TV. Then I got a master's and worked p.t. Then I went on to get 2 more grad degrees. YOu are single with no kids so have plenty of time. If it was important to you to change you would. WE only change when the pain of changing is less then the pain of staying the same.

Not everyone is a superstar. haha

But I agree, I need to make some changes. Which is why:

-I have dramatically changed the way I eat
-I signed up to take classes at the university I work at so I might be able to change careers
-I am applying for a few jobs a week
-I meditate daily

But I think it is important to remember that not everyone is geared or wired the same.
3-2-16, 1:15pm
catherine

Quote:

Originally Posted by UltraliteAngler

But I agree, I need to make some changes. Which is why:

-I have dramatically changed the way I eat
-I signed up to take classes at the university I work at so I might be able to change careers
-I am applying for a few jobs a week
-I meditate daily

But I think it is important to remember that not everyone is geared or wired the same.

Great changes, UA. And you are right. People aren't the same. That's why I love Stephen Covey's idea of the Circle of Influence and I love the Serenity Prayer. Life is about changing what you can and accepting the rest.
3-2-16, 1:17pm
Ultralight

Quote:

Originally Posted by catherine

Great changes, UA.

Thanks.

Quote:

Originally Posted by catherine

Life is about changing what you can and accepting the rest.

I agree. I change what I can and accept the rest -- just not cheerfully! haha
3-2-16, 1:22pm
Teacher Terry

Sounds like you are making good progress. If you don't want to be happy then don't worry about it. You will have lots of company I am sure. I choose to surround myself with positive people and not fake positive but real people. If I find someone consistently negative I move on. LIfe is too short.
3-2-16, 1:23pm
Ultralight

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teacher Terry

Sounds like you are making good progress. If you don't want to be happy then don't worry about it. You will have lots of company I am sure. I choose to surround myself with positive people and not fake positive but real people. If I find someone consistently negative I move on. LIfe is too short.

I am not so concerned with happiness but more with purpose and meaning.
3-2-16, 1:26pm
iris lilies

Quote:

Originally Posted by UltraliteAngler

I am not so concerned with happiness but more with purpose and meaning.

What about being "content?"

Is that word more palatable for you than "happy?" Would you like to be content and work toward that?

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