I love my neighbors.

How often can you say that?

Our house is old, and one of its issues is the back steps, which were uneven, and it has no handrail going up the 4 steps to the door. It's bad enough for me, but it's been TERRIBLE for DH, who is unsteady on his feet when sober, never mind when he's been drinking.

We meant to get a carpenter here, but disagreements on how do get this done, plus just time going by kept us from doing it.

Our neighbor is a roofer but is also extremely skilled in building and carpentry, and last weekend he OFFERED, without our asking, to fix the steps. So he's out there right now, building away--he took away the old steps and created new ones, and is now working on the handrail. He bought the wood himself (of course we'll pay him for that), but insists on nothing else.

AND not only that, we have also had another one of our neighbors, a 17-year old, offer to make us the handrail, too! (But C__ beat him to the punch)

Talk about community. We sure lucked out.

What would you do as a thank-you?

We were thinking of a gift card, since I know he won't take cash--so either a restaurant, or a gift card to Dick's or Cabela. (He and his partner are both serious outdoorsy people--she's the one I spoke of in another thread who hunts with a cross-bow.)

What would be tactful, but enough to show our appreciation? I'm not used to being obligated to neighbors!

A gift card is great. I think 50 would be great. Very nice neighbors.

And even if you had gone out to find someone to do that work getting someone to do small jobs like that it’s practically impossible in this Trump economy.

$50 is a nice amount it’s not insulting $100 even would be OK and not insulting. I would not do it to a restaurant card because a lot of those DIYers roll their eyes at spending big bucks in a restaurant.

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Originally Posted by iris lilies

I would not do it to a restaurant card because a lot of those DIYers roll their eyes at spending big bucks in a restaurant.

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That's EXACTLY what DH/DS and I thought!

i would suggest home made meals or jams or desserts or all of the above. You're a potter right? How about a nice serving platter?

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Originally Posted by Gardnr

i would suggest home made meals or jams or desserts or all of the above. You're a potter right? How about a nice serving platter?

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I'm not a potter--I think you're thinking of FloatOn.

But to your point, it did cross my mind to make them a few Friday night meals. We're here all the time, but they're part-time--they come out here from work on Friday nights to spend the weekend--it might be nice to not have to think about what to make and then cook it after a long work week. But, we're at the end of the season. They'll probably only be here one more weekend (October starts bow season).

Good neighbours are a blessing. The problem ones are the kindly souls who will accept nothing in return.

My one neighbour mows a small strip of grass that we share. I said that I would like to contribute towards the effort. They love wine so once a year, I buy a ($20) bottle of wine that has a high rating.

Another neighbour is wonderful as well. They have my house and mailbox keys in case mine are misplaced and I am very grateful for that.

But they want to house-watch by doing a daily walk-though my house whenever I am away. There is no favour that I can reciprocate as family surrounds and supports them. He had some health issues that caused me concern if he went downstairs. I phoned my insurance company who advised that they recommended a walk-through every 48 hours. When I offered a donation to a charity of their choice, I had no idea how much $$ depending on how long I was away. I don't want to be on any mailing list for any charity which was a problem with the charity he suggested so I donated $50 cash to him.

I also wanted to be free to go whenever I wanted and not schedule my life to synchronize with their life.

Finally, i decided to ask my dog walker who is available by text at any time and, I found out, also does security checks for $10 a visit. If I get held up anywhere, I send her a text and she walks my dog or if I have to be away for any reason I text her for a walk through. She has a key to my house. This is her business and she lives nearby.

I told my neighbour about this doing this routinely and he is hurt. I am independent by nature so want my freedom from emotional stress caused by neighbours who are kindly but too helpful.
Moral of this story - good neighbours are wonderful but sometimes setting boundaries can create problems.

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Originally Posted by catherine

That's EXACTLY what DH/DS and I thought!

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Yeah, that is what city folks do! Haha

Razz, interesting incident. I can see that too much earnest neighborliness is an impediment.

Pie is my suggestion.

I know you love plants and gardening; you could put together a big beautiful planter for outside their home next spring. You may or may not like the delay factor. The delay and the swapping of DIY for DIY would have the advantage of seeming less like payment for services rendered than a gift card now. But I can also see how a delay might feel uncomfortable, like too much time elapsing without you showing your appreciation. I think it's hard sometimes for someone with a generous spirit to be on the receiving end, but it sounds like your neighbor has a generous spirit as well.

My hubby is the good neighbor. He loves to shovel and get exercise so he shovels the entire block and up to the house door whenever it snows (12 to 4 times a year). He then turns the corner and does the ramp he put in for a disabled woman. He would be happy with a loaf of homemade bread, a pie, a plate of cookies, etc. He is even happier to have the homeowner just say thanks.

It started when our next door neighbor, who we did not know, was found taking his wife to his car in a wheelchair and having problems with the snow that had built up. He has just carried on. The neighbors on the other side mow our tiny tiny plot of grass when they do theirs and we take turns taking out and bringing back the garbage cans. Kind of like little acts of kindness that do not really require reciprocity.

You are setting the outline of your relationship with your neighbours. I agree that this one time, you reimburse for the cost of wood as you planned and then something special and no gift card. I keep thinking "be what you want to be". Would you want a gift card for something like this? What would you appreciate instead? That way you are sharing with your neighbour what your relationship in future years will be.

I had a neighbour that brought over veggies for 20+ years from his garden that he loved growing. When his beloved dog died, I did a graphite of that dog which he cherished until he passed away this summer. His wife returned the picture to me a few weeks ago as it had no meaning for anyone else in the family.

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Originally Posted by catherine

I'm not a potter--I think you're thinking of FloatOn.

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We were the glassblowers until closing down our studio a few years ago. Now I give gas cards! Our neighbor has a tractor and has taken care of our driveway, pulling out trees when they've fallen in storms. and burying our dog among other things. I always leave a gas card on his gate.

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Originally Posted by Float On

We were the glassblowers until closing down our studio a few years ago. Now I give gas cards! Our neighbor has a tractor and has taken care of our driveway, pulling out trees when they've fallen in storms. and burying our dog among other things. I always leave a gas card on his gate.

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That is a great idea!