I have a family member who can be really insensitive and offensive. She was an only child and very spoiled. She says she has only child-itis. I would call it narcissism; definitely very self-absorbed. Anyway, recently she went off on me and was really awful. She loves talking about herself and anytime a subject is brought up that is not about her, she doesn't like it. I was shocked and kind of horrified at her vile response. Afterwards, I had to do some self-care to get rid of all the yucky feelings from her outburst. Later she emailed an apology and said she was sorry.
In the past I have tolerated this stuff even though she never apologizes; I don't think she's even aware of how her behavior affects others. But it has affected me, no matter how hard I try to do the "it's who she is" thing. She's the only family member that I have where we live so I've always opted to preserve the family connection.
During the exchange, I was too shocked to cover my reaction to what she said. I made no effort to hide my feelings like I have in the past. I think this is why she apologized for the first time ever.
I want to accept the apology and let the matter go, but I do not want to be cheery about it (which was my first impulse). I don't want to pretend that what she said was okay. How do I do that?
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