The Daily Peeve / Rant

I have been spending the past couple of long weekends with my daughter. Lots of fun, no peaving there.

On my way home this afternoon I thought about stopping for fresh vegetables and some nice gooey bread, but decided to come straight home to dig into the freezer full of great food for which I spent a tiny fortune last week. I did shopping for three weeks and bought some really super ingredients for plenty of lovely meals.

I got home and went to take out a package of chicken hind-quarters and everything inside was cool, but soft. The freezer stopped working. I am just sick. Thank goodness for my little garden.

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Originally Posted by Jilly

I have been spending the past couple of long weekends with my daughter. Lots of fun, no peaving there.

On my way home this afternoon I thought about stopping for fresh vegetables and some nice gooey bread, but decided to come straight home to dig into the freezer full of great food for which I spent a tiny fortune last week. I did shopping for three weeks and bought some really super ingredients for plenty of lovely meals.

I got home and went to take out a package of chicken hind-quarters and everything inside was cool, but soft. The freezer stopped working. I am just sick. Thank goodness for my little garden.

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This isn't a peeve, this is serious. I'm so sorry to hear this!

Fleas again. Dang.

Jilly.......if you have renters or home owners insurance, they might cover your loss.

Cathy, that is a good idea, but I do not have receipts for any of it. I really should hand on to those.

Work politics. Barf.

Be wary of making homeowner/renter claims that are small enough to absorb, even if they hurt - get a few little claims, have one big problem (hail damage to a roof, say) and you're cancelled. Once that happens, it's really hard to get a good price on insurance again. Happened to my cousin. Just sayin'.

That I realized I am 52 and I have let every loved one in my life make choices for me, or I made the choices to fit them.

It is 95 freakin' degrees outside. I thought we were done with all this BS of high temps and humidity. I swear, the older I get, the more this kind of weather becomes almost a phobia for me. I'll do almost anything to avoid it.

I hate the fact that I need to go out and get a greeting card for a sick relative later, and I'm actually *afraid* to go out there and walk around in the heat. Afraid of what, you might ask? Just experiencing this kind of weather drags me down. I hate being sweaty. I feel more depressed than usual.

Yeah, it is like a phobia, isn't it?

http://orcasissues.com/wp-content/up...erwreckage.jpg

Bae, just curious. Did they die while fighting a fire?

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Originally Posted by AnneM

Bae, just curious. Did they die while fighting a fire?

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That's a piece of the World Trade Center. One of our firefighters drove out to NYC to pick it up and bring it back here a few years ago, where we have set up a memorial at our main station. We had a memorial service there this morning to remember The 343, and the other victims.

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Originally Posted by bae

That's a piece of the World Trade Center. One of our firefighters drove out to NYC to pick it up and bring it back here a few years ago, where we have set up a memorial at our main station. We had a memorial service there this morning to remember The 343, and the other victims.

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This isn't a peeve, it's a big sad thing. Maybe we should have an ongoing thread about large, sad, things that happen.

I don't feel right posting my rant about--well, whatever. It's always some dumb little thing that I quack on about, not in the same league as the 9/11 memorial things.

OK, I'll say it.

September 11, 2001, was an important day in American history. Many lives were lost tragically. I can only imagine the pain of having kissed your loved one goodbye in the morning and never seeing them alive again.

However, in the U.S. each year, ten times as many people die in auto accidents; ten times as many die of suicide; twice that many died fighting the "War on Terror". Each of those deaths left behind bereaved families and dreams cut short. Yet those deaths get nowhere near the news coverage and Facebook posts or tweets and millions of dollars spent on memorials and shrines that September 11 gets. And then there's what our collective reaction to the events back in 2001 have done to our civil liberties and our ability to travel and conduct business freely.

I understand (from having lived there) that the reactions of people in New York, Washington, Boston, and Pennsylvania are somewhat/largely cultural. I understand the particular investment of those families in which individuals died. But I think people wrapping themselves in the flag and in marginally-shared sacrifice for September11thedaythatchangedeverything give it way too much emphasis. Why don't people change their Facebook profile pictures for Pearl Harbor Day? That, too, commemorates an attack on U.S. soil and thousands of lives lost.

July 4, September 17 -- those are days which should define America. I hate to see us define ourselves by 9/11. It's a victim's mentality. America is better than that. Remembering is good. Remembering is important. But for a society to hollow itself with paranoia and false patriotism in the face of much bigger challenges to our way of life ... just seems a terrible waste.

Alright, the Nomex suit is on....

Steve, You articulated my feelings so well. When I see "never forget" on cars with Confederate Flags...well, it just rubs me the wrong way. The pseudo patriotism pushed during the wars made me ill. But, I think we are in the minority . I certainly do not want to dismiss the pain people still feel. It never goes away. But that is true for all tragedies, nationwide or personal.

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Originally Posted by SteveinMN

... false patriotism ...

Alright, the Nomex suit is on....

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Steve - that photo I posted is of a memorial, at my fire station. Where I wear a Nomex suit almost every day. It is in memory of firefighters who died trying to help people. False patriotism?

So, ...........

False Patriotism?

Why do you get to define someone else's feelings and emotions? Are your eyes the only ones that see the truth and your views the only ones worthy of respect? Must I, or anyone else, meet your approval on the anniversary of a day that changed our lives?

I don't want to speculate, but I'm guessing you've never taken an oath to protect and defend, to place others safety and security above your own, to remember the face of evil so that you'll recognize it the next time. to honor the victims of that evil. If not, how can you judge what you don't understand?

By what reasoning can you assume anyone's patriotism false?

I knew that post would draw conversation from certain quarters ...

bae, how long has that memorial been at your fire station? Is there a reason a chunk of the World Trade Center figures prominently? Are the losses of those firefighters' lives more worth commemorating than those of any other firefighters'? Why don't I see old guys wearing baseball caps labeled "Remember Seattle's Bravest"? Surely Seattle has lost firefighters in the course of duty. What about them and the losses of their families?

I have no problem commemorating the service of firefighters, police officers, and members of the military. They deserve commemoration. What I'm pointing out is that, for some reason, there are damn few public monuments to firefighters and police officers who've died over the course of the decades but a shower of coverage every September 11th for those specific people. I don't see red/white/blue ribbons on the back of cars and trucks urging us to "never forget" the state troopers who died when drunks ran into their patrol car during a traffic stop. Why does 9/11 get singled out so much? Yes, they were doing their job. So were all the other first responders everywhere, on September 10 and April 23 and December 25. As I said, I deny them nothing. I just want to know why the 9/11 responders seem so ... "anointed".

Alan, I can define patriotism just as ably as you can. Or anyone else can. Patriotism is not reserved for those who have served on front lines. And false patriotism is out there. It's that nonsense about questioning one's devotion to country in not wearing a flag lapel pin. It's implying that those who have not taken oaths to protect and defend are somehow less patriotic than those of us who have. It's in not challenging authority when authority clearly has its own agenda. Is it unpatriotic to suggest that something is afoot when Obama wants to lead a "surgical" strike in Syria despite the reticence of a vast majority of the American people and the international community? Was it unpatriotic to challenge the garbage evidence that Bush 43's regime provided when he wanted to invade a country that had nothing to do with 9/11? Why is it that it was "patriotic" to go shopping after 9/11 but not to take concrete steps to reduce American dependence on oil from these dictatorships -- like imposing a carbon tax? Why is it still considered unpatriotic to suggest that blank checks written on behalf of armed forces budgets and the shredding of the Constitution by the NSA and FISA could stand a little reasonable examination? Why are people so upset about Snowden but not about the massive amount of spying on American citizens which he exposed and which was categorically denied by those perpetrating it? Why doesn't December 7 get the press every year that 9/11 does? How was that different?

Patriotism is not just "my country, right or wrong" or "if you don't like it, leave". Unfortunately, that's where things have been headed for a long time. That's false patriotism. Putting a "remember our troops" sticker on the back of your single-occupant SUV for your 40-mile commute to work very often (note use of the qualifier) is false patriotism. Flag waving without discussing and embarking on a change of course to fix the problem is just making noise.

So, the term 'false patriotism' is simply projection? That's fine with me if it is, everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and beliefs but I reserve the right to reject the label.

You can feel free to write it off as a peeve, from 'certain quarters'.

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Originally Posted by SteveinMN

bae, how long has that memorial been at your fire station?

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Years now. The piece of steel was given to our department by FDNY, and one of our members drove across the country to bring it back here.

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Is there a reason a chunk of the World Trade Center figures prominently?

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Yes, it is a memorial to those who died in that particular incident. Which was the single highest casualty incident for firefighters in US history. It stands out, both for the statistics, and for the particulars of the day. We still go over some of the lessons learned every week in training. It's...important.

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Are the losses of those firefighters' lives more worth commemorating than those of any other firefighters'?

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Not particularly. But you make the incorrect assumption that we do not honor those others.

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Surely Seattle has lost firefighters in the course of duty. What about them and the losses of their families?

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Indeed Seattle has. We talk about them pretty often around the station, several perished in tricky ways that we'd all like to avoid, and their names come up in training. As to their families, you may be unaware of the large behind-the-scenes fraternal efforts that exist for mutual aid....

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What I'm pointing out is that, for some reason, there are damn few public monuments to firefighters and police officers who've died over the course of the decades but a shower of coverage every September 11th for those specific people.

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The monument I posted a picture of, while technically a "public" monument, is inside our station, built by firefighters, paid for by firefighters, and meant for firefighters and their families. There are several such memorials in our stations. There's a whole hall of them at the state fire academy...

Good day.

My daily peeve is my dwelling on some people who have done horrible things to me decades ago that changed the course of my life, and my letting them do it, and my dwelling on horrible things I've done to others decades ago.

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Originally Posted by Alan

So, the term 'false patriotism' is simply projection? That's fine with me if it is, everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and beliefs but I reserve the right to reject the label.

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You can reject mine; I can reject yours. I know I don't see the world the way most people do. I don't let that bother me personally.

As in so many other discussions in public discourse, definitions -- and agreeing to those definitions -- rule the day.

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Originally Posted by bae

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Originally Posted by SteveinMN

Are the losses of those firefighters' lives more worth commemorating than those of any other firefighters'?

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Not particularly. But you make the incorrect assumption that we do not honor those others.

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Actually, you have made an incorrect assumption. I never said that firefighters do not honor other dead firefighters. I said merely that commemoration of the deaths of the 9/11 firefighters in New York City -- especially in a place untouched in any linear way by the tragedy -- seems to honor their loss more than that of other firefighters who died in smaller numbers or in less noteworthy locations.

Maybe "peeve" is not a good word for my reaction to the hoopla that surrounds 9/11. I don't see networks interrupting their broadcasting each year for a ceremony recounting those killed aboard Navy ships in Pearl Harbor. I don't see cars around here with little ribbon magnets on the back honoring the memory of Twin Cities firefighters and law officers who died in the line of duty. I don't see hats and Facebook memes and tweets and lobbying efforts urging that we never forget the brave men and women who died trying to rescue people in Montreal during the rail-car fire a couple of months ago. Or soldiers who fought in, say, World War II. I don't think any of those people should be forgotten. Their loss is no less than anyone else's. And their losses are our losses.

Yet people who don't think twice about Washington's fallen firefighters -- or even know about them -- will slap a magnet on their car. I just don't think that's right. And, in its own way, it's not very honorable.

Good day to you.

Steve, the group-think of "we must honor the fallen on such and such a day" turns me off, so in a way I'm one of you. I don't like sentimentality. But I'd bloody well better think about honoring those who risk their lives for the sheeple like me at some point in the year. If I want to do that on September 12, that's ok. So is April 10. Don't tell me when, but I need to set my internal compass to at least have a moment.

This debate reminds me of those who consider themselves better Christians due to a variety of reasons. Those reasons usually include NOT going to church and rejecting the trappings of religion but they consider themselves truly spiritual, knowing the one true way of Jesus. Etc.

In the end, it's all supercilious oneupmanship. No one has the market cornered on patriotism, Christianity, or whatever -ism or -ity. Let people celebrate patriotism as they choose. Let people worship as they choose. It's all good.

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Originally Posted by SteveinMN

...Maybe "peeve" is not a good word for my reaction to the hoopla that surrounds 9/11. I don't see networks interrupting their broadcasting each year for a ceremony recounting those killed aboard Navy ships in Pearl Harbor.

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I wasn't born then. You most certainly was not born then. Haven't you talked to you mom about Pearl Harbor? That was a central event of her life. To me and to 3/4 of the people in this country (or is it 9/10?) we don't remember it.

9/11 commemoration events will die off, count on it. The next generations will have their own clarifying moments in time.

And another point: you are creating a false dichotomy. One can participate in 9/11 events AND ALSO honor fallen cops and firemen, it's not EITHER/OR. We do that here in my urban core neighborhood where we know and trust the cops, and support them every freaking day. I cannot tell you of all of the hours my neighborhood spends working on the police substation, gathering money to stock it for food and drink, organizing potluck police dinners, working with our neighborhood policeman in support and etc. If we don't contribute to the annual Guns Vs Hoses (cops vs firemen athletic event) or visibly support Backstoppers, people look at us cross eyed. I give cash toward the Xmas present of our neighborhood cop because if I didn't I'd feel really stupid.

I will also add that each and every time I drive by a particular commercial building where two firemen died, I think about them. Something about that fire, it's unexpected tragedy, and two very young families left without their fathers really makes me sad.

When we were last in Edinburough, Scotland, there was a fireman death being honored at St. Giles on the Royal Mile. My brother who is in emergency response work (Well, has been in the past) liked seeing how the Scots do this. There were lots of flower arrangements put up around the area.

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Haven't you talked to you mom about Pearl Harbor? That was a central event of her life. To me and to 3/4 of the people in this country (or is it 9/10?) we don't remember it.

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my dad was drafted in the war and seldom mentioned that day. The war was considered overall worthwhile in his story (i have no problem with that at all, but I also have minimal problem with those who raise questions). Still my dad suspected the army exposed him (and his fellow basic trainees) to poisons in basic training - always blamed his on and off coughs and nasal problems as possibly due to that (didn't smoke or anything). My dad had very good friends that were of Japanese ancestry who as little children had been imprisoned with their parents in the internment camps, despite being 3rd generation Americans. I interviewed them. Rememberance? Perhaps .... but sentimental?

Pop up ads & pop up ad blockers that block so much they really can't be used, >:(

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Originally Posted by iris lilies

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Originally Posted by SteveinMN
...Maybe "peeve" is not a good word for my reaction to the hoopla that surrounds 9/11. I don't see networks interrupting their broadcasting each year for a ceremony recounting those killed aboard Navy ships in Pearl Harbor.

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I wasn't born then. You most certainly was not born then. Haven't you talked to you mom about Pearl Harbor? That was a central event of her life. To me and to 3/4 of the people in this country (or is it 9/10?) we don't remember it.

9/11 commemoration events will die off, count on it. The next generations will have their own clarifying moments in time.

And another point: you are creating a false dichotomy. One can participate in 9/11 events AND ALSO honor fallen cops and firemen, it's not EITHER/OR.

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Actually, my mom was 7 when Pearl Harbor was attacked. I was 8 when JFK was shot and I recall nothing of that event other than my mom watching the TV and crying. So I don't know how well my mom recognized Pearl Harbor as an event then. Certainly she remembers WWII rationing and (distant) family members going off to war.

But I think you're right -- in time, September 11 will revert to being the day between the 10th and the 12th. I think that's a good thing. I don't believe that's a day that should define America beyond so many other days in our history.

And I know it's possible to participate in 9/11 events and honor the fallen. Maybe it would be better if the events concentrated less on the myriad (civilian) losses (the squabbling over the WTC memorial was quite unbecoming IMHO) and more on the idea of remembering fallen firefighters and law officers (and even victims of terrorism) no matter the day or the circumstance -- much the way Memorial Day morphed from its origin as a commemoration of Civil War dead.

il, this may scare you :), but I agree with both of your posts here 100%.

I just need to whine here for a moment before I get on with my day, it's those pesky, annoying, chronic albeit relatively minor aches and pains that keep me from feeling as good as I would like. My achy knees, the feeling of being terribly bloated and an allergic reaction to a bee sting from yesterday are bothering me today. Oh yeah, and bad allergies... That is all, thank you for indulging me. I am going to go have a cup of tea, make some art and forget about them as best I can.

Something new I've been noticing from service workers: the standard greetings like "good morning, how are you?" have now been stretched to include things like "do you have anything exciting planned for this weekend?"
I'm getting asked that in different places like the local deli to the bank teller to the chain drop-in haircut place.

Makes me feel put on the spot, like just saying "No" is disappointing to them because they'd rather me tell them something interesting. I know it's petty, but I'm doing errands, not trying to make conversation about my life to amuse someone.

I'm with you, Lainey! But I don't feel bad about being standoffish in my response. In 99% of the cases I'm sure they've been trained to ask that and I feel they don't most likely give a crap, anyway. For whatever reason I first noticed this at Potbelly and I still don't like to go there because of it. I like friendly, not trained.

Am loving watching your artistic creations on FB, SQ!

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Originally Posted by Lainey

Makes me feel put on the spot, like just saying "No" is disappointing to them because they'd rather me tell them something interesting. I know it's petty, but I'm doing errands, not trying to make conversation about my life to amuse someone.

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Like Kelli, I'm guessing that it's become an automatic greeting and the folks in stores don't expect a real answer to that question any more than they do to the question "how are you?".

Actually, it might be kind of fun to have some outlandish response ready. Like saying you're going to a coronation. Or that the President is coming over for a beer. Might get a good laugh out of it.

I kind of like when sales people say those things. I was in retail, part time, for a million years (in retail years).

I almost always say something outrageous. I am old and fat and all the rest, so replying that I am participating in a black belt tournament, or sky diving or riding bulls in the rodeo or giving a presentation on the proper mating habits of coatimundi at the governor's mansion please me.

This is more fluid if you are in line and have a chance to think of something. Last week I told the clerk that I was defending my apple bobbing title at the regional conference.

I like involving the President, though.

Once I had a huge bandage on my hand, and when the clerk mentioned it, I told him that I was stabbed in a bar fight.

OMG! I do that at work, to strike up a conversational tone with my customers! Most of the time people are happy to chat but I can see how some people are somewhat taken aback (like today, for instance)! We are strongly encouraged to be super-friendly and helpful; in fact, my job on the deli counter kind of depends on it...I have to say though if I am not in the mood to be sociable (like today) it takes a lot out of me.

@Fidgiegirl- thanks for following Taliswoman on FB! I'm having a lot of fun with it!

Yep, I'm ordinarily polite and friendly enough, but geez. I'm like fidgiegirl - I like friendly, trained, efficient, and timely customer service. If I can get that, I'm happy and I'll be back.

Reminds me of an article I read about a young woman years ago who was tired of strangers telling her to Smile! She decided to start replying "My brother died today." Of course that really threw them for a loop, and she was pretty sure they no longer went around saying that.

Some people are dealing with very serious stuff, so a truthful answer to this query might be that their weekend plans, e.g., are that they are helping their relative re-apply for Soc. Security disability so the relative does not lose their apartment. So now they have to make up something else for their circumstances to not be so depressing.

I guess if I worked in customer service I would take my cue from the customer - if they're there to buy a graduation cake, then by all means it's fun to chat them up about the party plans. But otherwise please don't ask me to entertain you while you're finishing my transaction. Gosh, sounds curmudgenly (sp) but I think that's what us borderline introverts would prefer.

http://i44.tinypic.com/2nvfimt.jpg

Took me an hour and 50 minutes to go the bit less than 20 miles to work today. >:( One of those Murphy's law applied to traffic days.

Geez Louise! My DD takes seizure meds. She has PHP, Medicare & Medicaid. She gets 2 different sizes of the one medication because they don't make a big enough tablet for her dosage. Well, she cannot have generics. But every now and then her Medicare RX decides that they will no longer pay for name brand. So DD's house manager calls the drug store to find out why it is being denied. Then she calls the Medicare RX co. who won't talk to her because she is not DD's guardian. Then she calls DD's neurologist to see if they will send the Medicare RX co. a note saying she cannot have generics. The person who does this is not in the office for a week and nobody else can do it. Then the House Mgr. calls me and tries to explain it to me. She is brand new to the position and this is new to her.

I don't quite understand what the problem is so I call the pharmacy who tells me that I have to call DD's DHS caseworker and the DHS caseworker has to do something on her computer files that tells Medicaid to over-ride something so that MedicareRX will pay for it. huh? So I call the Medicare RX co. They won't talk to me either. Thank you HIPPA (or however you abbreviate it). So I have to go find somewhere to fax a copy of the Guardianship papers to MedicareRX. Then I call MedicareRX again. They will talk to me now. But all he keeps saying is that they only pay for 5 mg & 25 mg Lamictal (DD needs 150 & 200 mg) something or other. Or if you use this other Lamictal ds something or other. So I finally got him to say that yes we do need to have the Dr. call them to get the form that they then need to fax to MedicareRX. They can't just fax something without using THE form.

So I waited until today when the person who takes care of this stuff is supposed to be back in the office. Had to leave a message and I can only hope that they will actually call me back to let me know that they are taking care of it.

I think I need a drink

Oh Azure, that is soooooooo frustrating! The ineffiency and ineptitude of *the system*. I think my daughter takes Lamictal too (or some new name-brand drug for her bi-polar that doesn't have a generic out yet), and I know she's had problems with Medicaid about it. Meanwhile, she runs out of meds, which can throw her into a tailspin. Luckily, the clinic she goes to can dole out samples until things get straightened out.