On another thread I've started, the conversation has moved on to discussing why people, particularly people with little money, spend money on what seems to be status items. Steve mentioned an article in which an interviewee at a job interview was looked down upon because she had a tank top on under her shirt instead of a silk shell. Steve then goes on to say
If I were to interview for another tech job and pulled out an old beat-up flip phone to retrieve a phone number, I would fail to meet the expectations of those interviewing me. I may not need a smartphone (or even want one) but sometimes the appearance it provides offers much more than the cost. And, courtesy of our consumerist society, even pulling out a smartphone is subject to some judgement ("Heh. Prepaid cheap Android phone." "What is that? It has a physical keyboard!").

I know some of what I've written here appears to contradict what I wrote earlier. It's not a simple thing. And we all get to make it up as we go along.
That made me think about the complexity of, well, everything - money, simple living, education, race and social status. My initial response was, "I can't imagine being judged for having an old flip phone, even if I were being interviewed for a programming job." That goes for a lot of things - we lived, by choice, without a car for eight years, and I still want to get back to living without a car. I arrived at the interview for my current job by bicycle, and I had no concerns that I might not get the job because I did not own a car. But when I've spoken to other people wondering why poor people that live in the city still own cars when it isn't strictly necessary, I've been told that they have to have a car if they want to be employed, and some people opt to live in their car rather than rent an apartment because the car is such a necessity for work.

Is it only when you have enough money to own a car that you can NOT own a car with confidence?

I also wonder the degree to which education plays a role. (My wife and I both have Master's degrees. Neither of us has seen a reason to go further on borrowed money. I would like to get my Ph.D., but since my academic "field" is roughly classic Chinese Buddhist poetry, I don't see it leading anywhere.) When my wife was pregnant with our second child, we were reading a bit about how healthy bare feet are, and she convinced her boss to let her be barefoot at work. Is it education that would allow my wife to get away with being bare-footed in a public work space, whereas it would be seen as a sign of poverty in a person who didn't graduate from high school? (And then there's Carrie from "Sex and the City" with her Manolo Blahniks. That's like a side of culture that seems utterly foreign).

And then, how much is just geography? If, instead of living in funky Santa Fe, I lived in the D.C. area, would I be more self conscious of my flip phone? I find that in Santa Fe, I'm only slightly out of sync with the culture, and in a way that people admire. I'm acquainted with the mayor and with some of the city councilors from my work on bicycle advocacy, and not in the way of "Oh my god, here's this guy at the microphone in the city council meeting again," but in a convivial, I'm glad you're part of the community way. I feel like I belong to the community, and I have a positive impact on the lives of the people that live in the community. To a large extent, I think that's because I am in just the right place for me and my predispositions.

I think all the issues go much, much deeper. In spite of my desire for simplicity, there are things I possess that, while perhaps not having mainstream cachet, are somehow important to how I see myself. I argue for them on the basis of quality and durability, but I think they might serve the same purpose as Carrie's shoes. I ride a custom made touring bicycle. I bought it because I couldn't find exactly what I wanted in local bike shops at the time I was looking for a bike, (1999ish. The type of bike I bought at the time has come somewhat back in style). However, from a strictly financial standpoint, a $200 bicycle would have been just as functional as my $4000 one. I wanted something specific to reflect what I was drawn to in the books I was reading. It wasn't to belong to a particular group, or even to impress any particular set of people, (and I'm actually a little embarrassed when someone recognizes the brand and wants to talk about my bicycle), but there was something I wanted to communicate to myself. I also like waxed cotton panniers, wool jackets, very specific vintage backpacking equipment, and so on. I have no idea how these particular items, or this particular style, became lodged in my subconscious, but there it is.

When you have enough money, even if it is just a little money, to have a particular style, maybe it doesn't matter so much what the style is. Maybe my flip phone doesn't project to people, "there's a guy who doesn't have enough money to buy a smartphone" but "there's a guy who sees himself as a flip phone user, (or a bicyclist, or a public transportation user). That's cool."

I should add, in parting, that I of course don't disregard money, however much I want to. I'm always struggling with the budget and family dynamics. I want to get this damn mortgage paid off, and I'm close, but because we don't have an astronomical income, I think I'm going to have to delay when I wanted to have it paid by because family matters keep coming up. (Activities, activity fees, blah, blah, blah). I'd like a tiny house in a pine tree grove with a nicely waxed wooden floor and beautiful windows next to a bicycle path that would take me into the heart of a vibrant and pedestrian oriented city. There are lots of things I want, but I want them because I have a mistaken image in my mind that they would help lead me to a sense of clarity, focus, and beauty. Maybe I see my inner state as my real social capital. Men like Gandhi impress me. Donald Trump, no so much. That clarity of purpose and intensity of life in people like Gandhi or Thich Nhat Hanh is what I've spent my life pursuing, and I see the preoccupation with and purchasing of various things as a sort of moral failure. (Maybe that's my fundamentalist childhood rearing its head, though my family had no problem with recreational shopping).

Anyway - I didn't mean to ramble on so long - what's your take on the whole complicated issue?