Move to a cheaper state?

[Spartana]

No kids but when I wanted to leave paid employment at age 42 and live off savings - yet stay close to my older parents who, like me, lived in expensive Orange County, CA. - I moved to a much less expensive part of CA. Only 100 miles away in a beautiful mountain, ski, and lake resort town. Housing, including rentals, were about one-third of the cost. So, since you aren't tied to a job, I would suggest you look for areas you like in CA. rather than move out of state if it's important to stay near your family.

[freein05]

No kids but when I wanted to leave paid employment at age 42 and live off savings - yet stay close to my older parents who, like me, lived in expensive Orange County, CA. - I moved to a much less expensive part of CA. Only 100 miles away in a beautiful mountain, ski, and lake resort town. Housing, including rentals, were about one-third of the cost. So, since you aren't tied to a job, I would suggest you look for areas you like in CA. rather than move out of state if it's important to stay near your family.

This is very true. We live in Calaveras County about 2 to 3 hour drive form the Bay Area. We live in the Sierra near ski resorts and many lakes and housing cost are very low and still have not recovered much from the recession. Most of the homes are second homes is probably the reason for the slow recovery. If you don't care for snow you can live in the motherload and housing is even cheaper.

[Cathy]

Thanks Catherine, since my divorce 10 years ago it's been hard connecting with my children, my ex has enmeshed himself into their lives and leaves little "breathing room" for me to be there too. He even showed up at my daughters baby shower dressed as a woman, to the shock of everyone there. We communicate mainly through phone calls and the birthday & holiday visits. It would be very expensive for us to stay here, draining our savings. My husband just wants ease, not stress. thanks for your reply!

[Cathy]

Thank you for giving me the chart of housing costs. Unfortunately we do not have the income to afford to buy at these costs!

[try2bfrugal]

Thank you for giving me the chart of housing costs. Unfortunately we do not have the income to afford to buy at these costs!

I didn't mean it for just buying, but home prices are also a relative indicator of rents. I went to Chico over the summer and the rent signs were pretty reasonable, and that is even in a college town. I do wonder if Colorado housing is really any cheaper than the more rural parts of California. Good luck in whatever you decide.

That was really weird about the baby shower.

[pinkytoe]

I do wonder if Colorado housing is really any cheaper than the more rural parts of California.

I've been looking at CO real estate too as I would like to return there when I retire. The "affordable" areas seem economically depressed. Everything else is probably out of our retirement income range
Co Sprngs however seems pretty reasonable as far as housing. Just don't know what it would be like to actually live in that particular city.

[Stella]

The baby shower story is both hilarious and kind of creepy.

[Cathy]

I really appreciate your responses! The idea that I could be free to live my own life too, outside of the traditional framework! This was like a breath of fresh air. We are so strapped here and I know my DH is staying here mainly for me to try to be close to my children and grandchildren. thanks again.......

[RosieTR]

If your contact is mostly phone calls and a couple of in-person visits a year, then maybe it would be good to consider moving. It's possible that would actually increase your relationship with them, since if they were visiting you then the ex would presumably not be there also and you would have a large stretch of time together rather than a few hours a few times a year if this is what the situation is currently. You would have to assess your family dynamics as to whether that might improve things or not. As for housing costs, it would totally depend on where you went but unless you're going for high luxury it's probably cheaper than LA area especially outside of the central metro areas of Denver and some of the tony suburbs.

[mtnlaurel]

We lived in a resort town in Rocky Mountains for years and had a parade of family visitors, even quite extended family, who would stay with us while vacationing (note NOT low cost of living where we were, but at least tax structure was easier on locals as most taxes gotten through tourist geared taxes). If your kids are in position to travel, Colorado Springs is a great homebase to visit Colorado from - and you might get regular visits with just them (no ex incognito) that are more intimate.

Other than that, I deeply regret the move there for me.
My dear Grandmother (who was more like my mom as she was the one that really raised me) was teetering on illness when we left and I spent all my time flying back to care for her while I had my own little babies in tow.
I did not connect with the lunar landscape (yes, it is beyond beautiful and I loved the outdoor activities, but I really didn't understand how connected I am to a lush, green environment)

How well do you get along with DH's family? Can you count on them as changes in your health may occur down the road?