As much as I enjoy the conversations I have, I would not enjoy discussing health issues or "how much I hate this job". Yes, there needs to be boundaries on topics.Originally Posted by Lainey
As much as I enjoy the conversations I have, I would not enjoy discussing health issues or "how much I hate this job". Yes, there needs to be boundaries on topics.
Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome. - Booker T. Washington
These are entirely reasonable concerns.
It got so that I hated to make eye contact with our tuckpointer because he would put down his tool and start yakking.That was merely annoying, but a stranger making inquiries about your living arrangement is a cause for concern. Of course it's entirely likely that don't intend anything by it, but how gauche of them and naive.
It was cool to see how professional my friend was about cleaning our house. There were things he didn't talk about until I brought them up in group casual, social conversation (like the horrific habits of our dogs or our always-filthy compost bucket by the sink). It's not a secret, but he understood the sensitive nature of working inside someone's home.
DH, while a kind-of chatterbox, zips his lips when he's got info about our friends. He works around our neighborhood and he knows who is getting their house ready to sell due to moving or divorce or they are fixing up a mother-in-law apt for someone to come in and live, or someone's child has moved back home due to problems, etc. He doesn't talk about that until it's public and he keeps confidential info confidential. But OTOH he's pretty chatty and I would find that strange if I didn't know how to turn it off. He runs around working like a busy bee but when the job is over, he will stand and yak for too long.
So this segues into not exactly a peeve but a comment on the difference of humans: I have what is probably a "short inner timer" for ending casual conversations. There are very few people with whom I wish to stand around and talk to in, say, the grocery store. I am there to get groceries. DH is different. When he runs into someone we know at the grocery store he will plant himself in one spot and yak. He is not a stream of consciousness yakker, he asks questions and listens and etc. It just as though he has no "inner timer" or else it is set for a very long timer. Perhaps he feels it impolite to end the conversation, I don't know, have never been able to figure it out. It is always the other person who ends the conversation in these situations. DH will stand in the spot, silently, but will never end the conversation. It's just very interesting.
That said, I am fine with casual chat if the purpose of the event is casual chat. We go to parties where the purpose is "to be social" so I can do that for hours, it's fine. I guess my "inner timer" isn't operating then.
Last edited by iris lilies; 2-14-14 at 12:46pm.
I am adding another peeve, clearly against the rules to peeve more than 1X daily, but I don't' care.
Why won't this lily seller act like a business? Do they want to sell me lilies? Then return my call or my email. Communicate for god's sake. Each year we have this problem, I badger them to verify that they received our order. I order for our Lily Society's sale and there is no room for error in a dropped order, I must have confirmation from her that she received our order. She doesn't respond. I call and leave message since they never answer the phone, no response. I email and call the same day--sometimes, she will respond to that.
When we owed her $1,000+ and she would not send an invoice I badgered her every two weeks for an invoice, no response. Finally, months later, she said that she had fired her bookkeeper who claimed to have sent out all invoices. But this lily business has been run this way for years. I realize that they are farmers and hybridizers and only secondarily wholesalers, but pleeeeease.
Needing patience but finding none.
A pothole ate my front passenger tire this morning at 5:45 am on the way to work. The roads are absolutely atrocious around here! Ironically, a guy I work with at Whole Foods who lives in my neighborhood hit the same pothole on the way to work this morning and blew out TWO tires! AAA Michigan was so busy this morning it took being on hold for one hour to just to request roadside assistance and it took another 1.75 hours of waiting for the tow truck. These poor guys are being kept so busy around here this crazy winter!
Last edited by SiouzQ.; 2-21-14 at 8:00pm.
"I can totally understand your concern, ha ha." 1. I don't care if you understand my concern, what I care about is whether you can fix my problem. 2. I know you're scripted to say this, and that makes it even worse. Do I need to outline my concern anyway? You've taken away my ability to comfortably express my concern without feeling like a redundant fool by saying you already know about it, and I don't like that. And do you actually understand my concern? Do you have a clue about my concern? Could you care less about my concern? Somehow I doubt it. Have you just co-opted a formerly reassuring phrase and made it completely meaningless in an attempt to shorten my part of this interaction after I've spent 20 minutes listening to Barry Manilow interspersed with encouragement to fix my concern online (which I certainly would prefer if it were an option, obviously I can't do that if I've actually bothered to call you) ? Oh Mandy, honestly.
My dog had to have 6 teeth pulled
I completely understand your concern. And sympathize."I can totally understand your concern, ha ha." 1. I don't care if you understand my concern, what I care about is whether you can fix my problem. 2. I know you're scripted to say this, and that makes it even worse. Do I need to outline my concern anyway? You've taken away my ability to comfortably express my concern without feeling like a redundant fool by saying you already know about it, and I don't like that. And do you actually understand my concern? Do you have a clue about my concern? Could you care less about my concern? Somehow I doubt it. Have you just co-opted a formerly reassuring phrase and made it completely meaningless in an attempt to shorten my part of this interaction after I've spent 20 minutes listening to Barry Manilow interspersed with encouragement to fix my concern online (which I certainly would prefer if it were an option, obviously I can't do that if I've actually bothered to call you) ? Oh Mandy, honestly.
That's a lot of teeth gone! I am home today after taking a dog for emergency surgery, he's got stones in his bladder and urethea. Now he is uncomfortable and hurting, poor baby. And I was thinking about dental surgery because the last time I had major surgery with a dog was about 2007 with $1800 in teeth removal. She went to the dental specialist in town because I was easily swayed by the other specialist's insistence that this was something serious. She did later died, in 2009, of something in her cranium, so perhaps the teeth problem was the harbinger of it.My dog had to have 6 teeth pulled
We just had another tooth surgery last month not so severe, with around 3 teeth removed from our youngest Frenchie.
So sorry about your dog, iris lilies. I have gazehounds and they are notorious for their weak teeth (and dislike of brushing
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” -- Gandalf
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