I am 52 years old and it still rankles me when my mom makes a comment about my appearance; she really doesn't like my dread locks and I should get rid of them, and why don't I wear some lipstick? Number one, I hate wearing lipstick, I feel like my lips stick out a mile with it on, and two, I am not the kind of female who likes being girly-girly, period! I tried on and off for years to conform and it is just not me! I have never been more happy with my appearance, for the most part, until the last few years ~ I am tall, fit, tan, and have crazy hair that I don't want to deal with anymore, hence the dreads. I don't have the time or desire to please others, I'm too busy living my life and being comfortable about who I am and how I look. This is what I should have said to my mom this morning, instead of shutting down and her accusing me of being defensive. My entire life I think she has found fault with both me (for not being girly enough?) and my sister (for being overweight). I have long struggled with a negative self image and when she says stuff like that it can still raise my hackles!