I think you were just pushing her buttons and she became defensive. That's another whole question, though.. a relationship one, and none of my business.

I don't see any correlation between minimalism and hard-heartedness. Was Jesus hard hearted? Buddha? Tolstoy? St. Frances? Mother Teresa? Sorry about the religious references--I DO know who I'm speaking with here , but the point is, these people were NOT known for being hard-hearted, and you could also describe them all as "extreme minimalists." The whole idea of minimalism is to keep material distractions at bay so you have more TIME for more meaningful, deeper relationships. You discard THINGS so you can embrace PEOPLE, and I do believe that is a driving force for many minimalists--certainly not all, though. I wouldn't want to generalize.