Quote Originally Posted by kib View Post
I was looking at it from a more general perspective, really. I am - or at least I was - passionate about simple living and streamlining of my life and my possessions. Passionate. You could almost say it was a religion for me. I wound up with someone who claimed they "got it", but in retrospect they didn't agree that OUR life, together as a couple, would really reflect this. Frugal was for when you really didn't want the thing anyway. Minimal only applied to My stuff, all the free space in our house has gradually been taken over by junk no one really wants. "Green" - e.g. recycling, using cloth napkins - is not a philosophy, it's something he only does when I'm watching. It became obvious that "simple" means it's fine that I sit in a chair and meditate - once all the chaotic mess I didn't create has been dealt with. Discussing any goals and challenges in this arena was pointless because there was no underlying agreement that this was the direction we wanted to move in. Basically "all that" - my life's work - was supposed to be my downtime hobby in his opinion.
If I can be blatantly honest for a moment... This sounds so desperate and sad. Just heartbreaking...

Short n sweet: it's one thing to have separate interests, but I firmly believe sharing an underlying philosophy of what matters, how to move life in that direction, and how to work as a team toward a shared vision makes for a higher quality relationship.
I agree.