I don't know what's up its you and your mom on that. There are things I've loaned people because I'm happy for them to have them, but I'm not happy for them to get rid of them (I want this, but if you want it too, I want you to have it more than I want it.).

I'm afraid my brother forgot that that was the case with a particular toy we had as kids, and got rid of it, but I'm dealing with that by pretending he's still keeping it even though his youngest has outgrown it. I won't ask, because if he did get rid of it, I'll be sad.

i know that you don't get the level of regret I feel over not having an object for someone - it doesn't make sense. it's pathalogical.

dd is making good progress today. She went through a keeping bin and recycled a big stack of old schoolwork, and purged about a grocery bag of other stuff so far. Now she's putting away/sorting shoes and clothes. I'm suffering some vicarious stress about her stuff. I accepted the gift of a pair of boots and I may keep a little magnetic frog too.