
Originally Posted by
bae
I lived with my wife for 15 years before we got formally married. We had "declared unity" to all of our friends and family. We owned a home together. We had powers of attorney for all sorts of things (thank goodness she is a lawyer).
It was still an unbelievable pain. I was admitted to a hospital once after a car crash, they wouldn't let my sweetie in to see me, or to direct my care. Even though she a) was my attorney! b) had wads of paperwork. They wanted to sort it out after the fact.
In today's system, couples need protection. Protection that even the best-crafted piles of powers-of-attorney, contracts, and domestic partnership arrangements don't afford in real time.
And even today, we get friction still because our last names are different....