The balance between paying down debt and savings

[Tradd]

Some BS going down at work - don’t need to get into details - so I’m going back to paying a bit more than minimum payment and stashing everything else in savings. GRRR. I think even DR would say to do that in this situation. And yes, I’m looking again. Plenty of management positions, but I don’t have the experience or temperament for those.

[happystuff]

Sorry work is being such a pita, tradd. Good luck with the job search. And congrats on the savings/cc payments!

[Tradd]

I’ve been listening to DR podcasts a ton at work lately. Besides the massive cat payments that are weighing people down, it seems like people are having kids who just can’t afford them.

[catherine]

I’ve been listening to DR podcasts a ton at work lately. Besides the massive cat payments that are weighing people down, it seems like people are having kids who just can’t afford them.

Kids are expensive, that's for sure. "In the old days" (I don't know how I feel about being one of those people who always reference "the old days") kids were cheaper. You washed diapers for instance Nowadays, disposable diapers are a given, even for people who care about the planet and landfills... and they are really expensive. Most partners are working, so day care is HUGE. my son paid $2000/mo for his two kids--now one is in public school, so that's a grand in his pocket. People spend a huge amount on kid accoutrements like state-of-the-art carseats, which are now required until the kids are like 7 years old, playpens, strollers etc. Plus the daycares insist you bring 7 different snacks every day, which typically are organic berries and other specialty baby foods, many of which get tossed at the end of the day because Baby isn't feeling it

I couldn't afford kids but had them anyway. If it hadn't been for MIL who bailed us out more than once, I don't know what would have happened to us. It wasn't until I lucked into my market research career and DH lucked into his TV/video production business that we finally were able to stand on our own two feet. And even then, we had club fees and cheap crappy cars for the kids to drive, and college tuition, and family vacations, etc etc. We made it through of course, and I would never have done it differently, but it taught me a lot about myself. I am grateful that I wound up with 4 well-adjusted, creative, productive kids. Again, I feel I lucked out. My final task as a parent is to try to guide them to "do as I say, not as I did" in terms of financial literacy.

[Tradd]

I’ve been doing a bit of research into side hustles. Things like Instacart aren’t an option due to my knees with severe osteoarthritis. I don’t alway grocery shop for myself due to my knees! If I didn’t have the knee issue, I think I’d do it. For a year during Covid, I grocery shopped for a senior friend from church. I enjoyed it. Uber/Lyft are not something I feel comfortable doing as woman, plus my car is always full of dive gear anyway and is beat up from diving. There are no remote options for my industry I can find for off hours. I often have work for current job to be done on weekends, anyway.

[Tradd]

I love McD sausage muffins. English muffin, sausage patty, cheese. NO EGG! I decided to try making them at home. Muffin was $0.43, sausage patty, $0.44. Bag of 18 oatties from Aldi and they are very good. I’ve had the cheese for a while so I don’t remember how much I paid. So for about $1 I had a very yummy treat at home. McD js $2.19 or 2/$2.59.

I don’t have a toaster so I toasted muffin in a skillet. I nuked sausage. Once assembled, I nuked the whole thing for about 20 seconds to melt the cheese.

[sweetana3]

Tradd, my husband did something similar. He used to get quick fix breakfast bowls to microwave. After studying them he found they had a lot of salt and unnecessary ingredients. So now he cooks up either lean turkey or homemade bean burgers and keeps some in the refrigerator. Some burger, one egg and a slice of good cheese popped in the microwave for 90 seconds makes a great protein salt managed breakfast. I make my own granola and control the content and sugars.

Both of these keep costs way down and even help the environment with the reduction of packaging.

[Portuguese John Here]

Since we're talking about children's, I'll talk a little about it too, it's been on my mind the past week. I'm in conflict on this subject.

I wish I had a kid on one part, because part of adulthood for me is taking responsibility for someone else. I don't have a partner, though, and probably won't have because I'm not in the circles. That's part of the conflict, managing expectations, I can't be living with a weight in my mind, neither can have a fixation, otherwise, I can be exploited by the wrong bunch later on. Although, I'm not happy living a life self-centered, focusing on my bliss, like I'm doing now.

There's a lot of people who could and choose not to have children's, because they want to enjoy life, and focus on themselves, that's an ongoing practice nowadays, people don't want something if you can't give them something. There's those who'd like to have, but can't afford them, and those who can't have them. I'll now talk about a bigger problem among the young generation people ain't talking about.

Pornography, in young guys, is setting the standard they seek in woman. This is completely destroying relationships. They have a partner but don't have intercourse with her, instead, they resort to pornography, the partner is there only from the social stigma and the fear of being alone. There are others, that don't have a partner because they can't feel the attraction, so they are alone. Children's can be a problem in the near future, I think it's a problem as we speak, it'll be not a problem of having the money, but what we seek in a partner.

[Tradd]

I’ve not had a massage since early December since I was sick last month, but it helps my sciatica a ton. The affected hip has been hurting badly so back MT on Wednesday. $120 but it feels so good.

[rosarugosa]

Since we're talking about children's, I'll talk a little about it too, it's been on my mind the past week. I'm in conflict on this subject.

I wish I had a kid on one part, because part of adulthood for me is taking responsibility for someone else. I don't have a partner, though, and probably won't have because I'm not in the circles. That's part of the conflict, managing expectations, I can't be living with a weight in my mind, neither can have a fixation, otherwise, I can be exploited by the wrong bunch later on. Although, I'm not happy living a life self-centered, focusing on my bliss, like I'm doing now.

There's a lot of people who could and choose not to have children's, because they want to enjoy life, and focus on themselves, that's an ongoing practice nowadays, people don't want something if you can't give them something. There's those who'd like to have, but can't afford them, and those who can't have them. I'll now talk about a bigger problem among the young generation people ain't talking about.

Pornography, in young guys, is setting the standard they seek in woman. This is completely destroying relationships. They have a partner but don't have intercourse with her, instead, they resort to pornography, the partner is there only from the social stigma and the fear of being alone. There are others, that don't have a partner because they can't feel the attraction, so they are alone. Children's can be a problem in the near future, I think it's a problem as we speak, it'll be not a problem of having the money, but what we seek in a partner.

We have a single friend, and DH says the friend spends much of his time watching porn. DH thinks this is a big reason why he doesn't have a partner; unrealistic ideas about women and not a good sense of how to interact with a real one.