Ah, catherine. Your BIL's money is his money, and also YOUR money is his money. You are the great and givIng mom, In his mind, anyway.

I was wondering about you taking the action, or inaction, of simply not paying the real estate taxes. How would that affect your bil's attitude? I don't know what will keep you from being exactly in this same place a year from now on December 31,2017.

While it sounds risky, it takes years for a property to get to the stage of a tax sale, here in my city anyway. At any point you can swoop in and pay the taxes, and penalties (which are minimal here) and get your property back. Sure, in the real world it is not something I would do because it is just too scary, but I know several people who pay their taxes a year after they are due. I look up property on on our city assessor's database and see these things.